Understanding Children Through the Lens of Trauma, Adaptation and Predictive Processing
This document was inspired by learning from a presentation delivered by Nick Pidgeon and has been further developed present a balanced and evidence-informed overview of why children who have experienced adversity may present differently, what adults should observe and understand, and how we can respond in ways that support healing and development.
Children who have experienced neglect, abuse, violence, loss, instability, rejection, or other forms of significant adversity often present with behaviours that can be confusing, challenging and, at times, distressing for the adults around them.
Traditional explanations have often focused on behaviour management, compliance, emotional regulation, attachment difficulties or diagnoses. While each of these perspectives may offer useful insights, they do not always explain why some children continue to struggle long after they have entered safer and more stable environments.
Increasingly, research from neuroscience, psychology and trauma studies suggests that many of these behaviours are best understood not as signs of dysfunction or deliberate misconduct, but as adaptations to earlier experiences.
Understanding behaviour through this lens does not remove responsibility or accountability. Rather, it helps adults respond more effectively by recognising the experiences that may be influencing a child’s expectations, perceptions and responses.
How Children Learn About the World
From birth, children are continually learning about the world around them.
Through repeated experiences, they develop expectations about:
- whether adults are safe and trustworthy
- whether their needs will be met
- whether relationships are predictable
- whether they are valued and worthy of care
- whether the world is generally safe or dangerous
Modern neuroscience suggests that the brain does not simply react to events as they happen. Instead, it constantly draws upon previous experiences to predict what is happening and what may happen next.
These predictions help us navigate everyday life efficiently and safely. Most of the time they are remarkably accurate.
However, the predictions we make are heavily influenced by our previous experiences.
When Early Experiences Involve Harm
For children who grow up experiencing fear, neglect, abuse, violence or chronic instability, the brain learns a different set of expectations.
Repeated experiences of danger can lead children to develop internal working models that suggest:
- adults may not be safe
- relationships may involve harm
- the world is unpredictable
- vulnerability carries risk
- danger can emerge without warning
These are not conscious decisions.
They are adaptations developed through repeated experiences.
In environments where danger is real, such adaptations can be highly protective.
The challenge emerges when those same adaptations continue after the child has become physically safe.
Understanding Behaviour as Adaptation
Many behaviours that concern parents, carers and professionals can be understood as attempts to remain safe within a world that has previously felt unsafe.
These behaviours may include:
- aggression
- emotional outbursts
- withdrawal
- avoidance
- controlling behaviour
- hypervigilance
- risk-taking
- difficulty trusting others
- intense reactions to seemingly minor events
- difficulties with transitions or change
Without understanding the child’s history, these behaviours can appear irrational, oppositional or manipulative.
However, when viewed as adaptations to previous experiences, they often become more understandable.
The behaviour itself may not be helpful in the child’s current environment, but it may once have served an important protective function.
Why Children May React to Everyday Situations
Children affected by trauma may react strongly to experiences that appear harmless to others.
Examples may include:
- being told “no”
- a raised voice
- a particular tone of voice
- a specific smell
- physical proximity
- a school environment
- transitions
- unexpected change
- being corrected
- feeling excluded
- perceived rejection
These reactions are not necessarily conscious choices.
Research increasingly suggests that the brain uses previous experiences to predict potential threats.
If an experience resembles something associated with danger in the past, the child’s nervous system may respond before they have consciously processed what is happening.
This helps explain why reactions can appear sudden, intense and disproportionate to the current situation.
Behaviour is Information
One of the most useful shifts adults can make is moving from viewing behaviour purely as a problem to viewing behaviour as information.
Behaviour may tell us something about:
- how safe a child feels
- what they expect from others
- what experiences may have shaped them
- what they are trying to avoid
- what they are trying to communicate
- which situations feel threatening or overwhelming
This does not mean that all behaviour should be accepted.
Rather, it means that understanding the reasons behind behaviour is often essential if meaningful change is to occur.
What Should Adults Observe?
Rather than focusing solely on what a child does, it can be helpful to become curious about patterns.
Questions that may support understanding include:
What happened immediately before the behaviour?
- Was there a demand?
- Was there uncertainty?
- Was there a transition?
- Was there a perceived loss of control?
What might the child be expecting?
- Rejection?
- Failure?
- Criticism?
- Shame?
- Punishment?
- Abandonment?
What purpose might the behaviour serve?
- Protection?
- Escape?
- Control?
- Connection?
- Avoidance?
- Self-preservation?
Is there a pattern?
- Certain people?
- Certain environments?
- Particular sensory experiences?
- Particular times of day?
Observation and curiosity often reveal far more than behaviour alone.
The Importance of Relationships
Research consistently demonstrates that relationships play a central role in child development and recovery from adversity.
Safe, consistent and attuned relationships provide opportunities for children to develop new expectations about themselves and the world.
Children learn safety not simply through being told they are safe, but through repeatedly experiencing:
- reliability
- consistency
- predictability
- empathy
- understanding
- emotional availability
Over time, these experiences can help children revise expectations that were formed in response to earlier adversity.
Supporting Children Effectively
While every child is different, several principles consistently emerge across trauma-informed practice.
Create Safety
Children need more than physical safety.
They also require emotional, relational and psychological safety.
Adults should aim to create environments that are predictable, calm and respectful.
Prioritise Connection
Children are more likely to engage with guidance, learning and boundaries when they feel understood and connected.
Connection does not remove boundaries.
It strengthens the effectiveness of those boundaries.
Remain Curious
Curiosity helps move adults away from assumptions and towards understanding.
Instead of asking:
“What is wrong with this child?”
consider asking:
“What might this child be communicating?”
or
“What experiences may have shaped this response?”
Support Co-Regulation
Many children who have experienced adversity struggle to regulate emotions independently.
Before children can consistently self-regulate, they often need adults who can help them feel calm, understood and safe.
This process is sometimes referred to as co-regulation.
Recognise Strengths
Many adaptations that develop in response to adversity reflect remarkable resilience.
Children may demonstrate:
- persistence
- determination
- resourcefulness
- vigilance
- independence
- problem-solving abilities
Recognising strengths alongside difficulties helps create a more balanced understanding of the child.
A Balanced Perspective
Trauma-informed practice is not about excusing harmful behaviour or lowering expectations.
Children still require boundaries, accountability and opportunities to learn.
However, effective support is more likely when adults understand the factors that may be driving behaviour.
Understanding and accountability are not opposites.
In practice, they work best together.
Conclusion
Children who have experienced significant adversity are often responding not only to what is happening in the present moment, but also to what their experiences have taught them to expect.
Many behaviours that challenge adults can be understood as adaptations developed in response to environments that once felt unsafe, unpredictable or overwhelming.
By combining clear boundaries with curiosity, consistency, connection and compassion, adults can help children develop new experiences that gradually support healing, growth and resilience.
The goal is not simply to change behaviour.
The goal is to help children develop new expectations about themselves, other people and the world around them.
Background and Evidence Base
The ideas explored within this document draw upon a number of influential fields of study, including developmental neuroscience, trauma studies, attachment theory, interpersonal neurobiology and predictive processing.
Key contributors include:
Trauma and Development
- Bruce Perry
- Bessel van der Kolk
- Judith Herman
Attachment and Relationships
- John Bowlby
- Mary Ainsworth
- Dan Siegel
Nervous System and Safety
- Stephen Porges
- Deb Dana
Predictive Processing and Emotion
- Lisa Feldman Barrett
- Andy Clark
- Karl Friston
References
- Lisa Feldman Barrett. (2017). How emotions are made: The secret life of the brain. Houghton Mifflin Harcourt.
- Lisa Feldman Barrett. (2020). Seven and a half lessons about the brain. Houghton Mifflin Harcourt.
- Steven Kotler, Michael Mannino, Glenn Fox, & Karl Friston. (2026). The body does not keep the score: Trauma, predictive coding, and the restoration of metastability. Frontiers in Systems Neuroscience, 20, Article 1812957.
Recommended Video
Lisa Feldman Barrett: You aren’t at the mercy of your emotions — your brain creates them – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-ewfP4BC7RA&t=19s