Dear Adopter in Crisis,
You never expected this.
You planned for something so different. You weren’t naive. You felt prepared. Your heart was ready. Your home was ready. Your family was prepared. Your world was open.
You stepped into the world of adoption with love, hope and the belief that, whatever came your way, you would find a way through it together.
The first days and years bumped along. You learned to love and receive love, to hold hurt and be hurt. You learned to live with questions that had no answers, and to try to understand things that sometimes made little sense.
Then the road got bumpier, and the challenges became harder.
The loneliness.
The lack of understanding.
The responses that failed.
The feeling of not being heard.
You wake with a heart full of worry and go to bed with a head full of it, your nerves frayed and your mind still racing.
You advocate, ask, request, refer, beg and keep asking.
You know there should be support. You expected support. You believed that when things became difficult, someone would be there to help.
But the crisis deepens.
Friends drift away. Family step back. Services are nowhere to be seen.
It is chaotic, exhausting and relentless. It is complicated, frightening and, at times, beyond anything you could ever have imagined.
Hour after hour, day after day, you witness your child’s pain. You hold their hurt, their fear and their distress, often unseen by the very people who should be helping you.
**No pathway.** It simply isn’t there.
**No help.** There are too many holes in the safety net.
**No understanding.** Too often, nobody seems to get it.
**No recovery.** Not for your child. Not for you. Not for your family.
And yet, you keep going. You keep fighting. You keep showing up for your child, even when you are running on empty.
To every adopter living this reality, we want you to know something.
**PATCH sees you.**
We know this is happening. We know the impact it has on children and the families who love them. We know that love alone cannot repair trauma, and that families cannot be expected to navigate these challenges without the right understanding, support and help.
We are pushing for change, and we will not stop.
Because this is not what adoption should look like.
**It is not OK for families to be left like this.**